family January 19, 2018
please pray for wisdom as my family’s attitude has changed toward me or rather it has been revealed to me what has always been in their heart about me. please pray that the Lord will take away the things they hold over me that they oppress and hold me in such contempt for for they are purposely manipulating me to play the role they assigned and they know i would not like what they are doing so they try to hide it but i see. do not let them oh Lord have their way and change their promise. do not let them do this to me . do not let them frame things to give to those that sway them because of money and friends and power and social clout and who they let buy them with gifts and who strive to take my position. Oh Lord see what is happening and help me for my family is doing me wrong. Change their minds about what is their thoughts toward me and the things they think is my place in the world. Help me for they are very deceptive and turn hearts against me. They play games of intrigue and seek to shift blame as difficulty comes. My father is abandoning his duties and empowering ones in our family over me … he acts like our family is a mob and has run away from things like a dog owner that has no bag for his dog’s business and wants to run away before anyone sees. He is trying to make this my fault and is trying to give an excuse to do what has always been his bias; please oh Lord do not let him do this to me or this family. Give him strength and give him understanding that what he thought was right is not right that he may not let my brother rule over me. Help me oh Lord for my mother deceives him and they have not been parents to me and hide their neglect from others. Question is why do they feel sorry toward my siblings but do not feel sorry toward me that they hold these opinions? Shouldn’t they oh Lord? shouldn’t they be seeing this as wrong? Help them see they have created this and are blaming me and are deceiving themselves with their own sin. Help them see that the problems they have with me is because they have not been willing to give me what they were so willing to give themselves and the ones they favored instead but did not want to admit it . it has nothing to do with me … they simply just never wanted to let me have what they have and always thought my place was a place i did not want to be but it is their own ambition and wish to keep this turf that they make excuses to justify it. show them this has always been their desire not mine and that they are projecting. show them they have always been unwilling to help me. please pray that this spirit that seeks to separate me away from things and their desire always to see me lower is their error not mine.