mathematics and physics December 15, 2017
I would like to work as a highly paid professional physicist and mathematician and philosopher and to have necessary understanding of engineering and programming. I need a Phd at my local university even though of course you can do science without one and to be vetted competitively by the best in different professional societies and fellowships and groups. I see a social game being played that even my own father and family play against me because they always need to believe they are better. I do not want to work in many of the typical subject matters that people seem to think of immediately when they see me and when they think what a mathematician and physicist would do for a living. I do not want to work on mental health or medicine, specifically and directly on military matters, entertainment, business/finance, education, social issues like woman’s issues, only theological or metaphysical issues,etc. Although I would want to be able to recommend how my more fundamental systems of knowledge and thought might have future applications to those things; but people tend to think someone like me is necessarily only interested in the concrete rather than the abstract and spiritually anointed. It’s really weird you know? If I do one thing and those they favor do another than what I do is stupid,and if they do it and I do the other than what I do is still stupid. That’s how it is with them because they always need to think they are better. The only areas I am allowed to shine are areas they think belong to my background by birth. I want to work on foundational topics that you do at the leadership end of things that forms the working knowledge people have in these areas like mechanics, electromagnetism, quantum mechanics, relativity, etc. And in mathematics to lay new branches and uses that are central. I am very hard pressed; people around me only value money and gender or things they only want to respect about my gender as a measure of respect. If it were not for the Lord I would be on the street. My parents scheme against me everyday wanting things for me I do not want and wanting things for my brother that I do want. May the Lord rebuke them.